Why do I Give In?

by Niinaa   Oct 9, 2007


Why Do I Give In
And listen to what people say,
The insults that they say to me,
Each And Everyday.

Why Do I Give In
To peer pressure all around,
The things they make me do,
Their words so loud.

Why Do I Give In
To the drugs And alcohol?
If all people want to see,
is me breakdown and fall.

So, Why Do I Give In
When you don't even care
Why is the life I'm living,
So damn unfair.

P.S sorry i haven't written in such a long time

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Latest Comments

  • 16 years ago

    by Alexa Eudis

    Couldnt tell at all that you havent written in a while, i liked it

  • 16 years ago

    by MeltInHisArms

    Very true, i like it 5/5
    xoxo
    ~waiting~

  • 16 years ago

    by Kaila

    It wasn't bad. Actually for not writing for a long time can really bring out good pieces. Here is some advice. 1. Try to have the same syllabol count in each line. an Ex. 5,6,5,7. It just makes it easier and the flow is much better. 2. Try to explain in more detail why you feel this way. It really helps the reader understand the situaution more. 3. Try to have a bit more emotion. The words that have emotion could be wanting, angst, desire, you know just throw some of those in there and it really helps out the poem.
    3/5
    kaila

  • 16 years ago

    by Lemma

    Especially love the ending of this one, full of emotion. I like the structure of this and it's obviously straight from the heart. But so sad, chin up yeah? =)

    Em xXx

  • 16 years ago

    by halie

    I loved it
    :]
    5/5
    keep writing

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