As I walked through the door of a new life
I took a deep breath convincing my self for a new path of love
As I walked through the light, I finally felt freedom
Hatred was gone from my blood, soul, and my heart
Happiness and peace grew in me
I looked at the moon and smiled a full smile thinking about the things I used to do
I closed my eyes took a deep breath and screamed giving my farewell to my ignited pain
My soul had an evil toxic hate on it that controlled me in many ways
My heart was heavy with pain and grief that took the old me away
Iâ??m now free and my soul will never plea
My heart is lonely looking for another girl to glee
My loneliness shook my soul telling me that time had past
Loneliness was flowing in my blood stinging my heart with needles leaving me with a black solid heart that beats every time I see her face
Loneliness was stabbing me with a sharp blade that stains my body with suffering
I was blind for all these years trying to convince my self that this is the real me
She never new whatâ??s going on in me she just played along with a smile leaving me with no mercy
I was stupid wasting even seconds in my life
Three years had past and my heart didnâ??t beat a single beat for other girls
You were my life my soul my love
But I was nothing to you
And now Iâ??m a different man who walked through a path of a new life waiting for a new angel to fulfill my dreams
I donâ??t want to see you again I want you to stay away from me
Leaving me behind for me to find my real angel
I donâ??t hate you, but youâ??re actually my biggest mistake
Tears had marched down my cheek
My heart took a big risk of worshiping you, leaving me with an aloof personality that made me drain every time my eyes looked at you
I always used to say to my self that you will be in the deepest core of my heart
I always said that youâ??re an angel that is brought from above
I always said that I donâ??t care if I lose seconds in my life
But now youâ??re actually a girl that slashed me in half with words
With words that made me nothing, feeling that Iâ??m sitting in the darkest corner in a fetus position looking at my shadowâ?¦
I know itâ??s not your fault itâ??s my heart who led me in a wrong path
A path of love
My inner mind was filled with torture
My heart was numb and my mind was sore with thoughts
You didnâ??t do anything wrong
I just loved you because you some how invaded my heart
And I just didnâ??t know how to fight back
Hope was gone from my mind and heart
Misery approached me finding answers to let me drown in my tears with repulsion on my back
Agony was planted like a plant in the core of my heart that grew each time you mention a single thing about me
This plant grew in me holding memories that left me down
Three years had past and that plant of pain became a tree holding in each branch a memory of disgust.
I used to look at the sky
The sky was blacker than black
The dank air touched my shivering skin
I heard quietly when the wind whispered your name
Even The stars drew your face
I smiled and tried to look beyond the stars
Maybe the thing that left me needing you is loneliness
My heart opened its doors for the wrong girl
Welcoming her with all my power to just see her smile
Every time I see her itâ??s like imagining her throwing knifes at the top of my stomach and twisting them till I feel sorrow in the core of my eyes
I wish you heard me screaming your name
I actually wish you heard my pain
I wish you didnâ??t feel sorry for me
I wish you just told me at the first time before my heart decided to place you in the deepest core that nobody can even reach
My conscious deceived me with pure lies telling me that there was hope
And my heart just felt all kinds of pain crashing into me
I was confused all that time
While my soul was being abused
Youâ??re just running away from me right now trying to help me forget my pain
I thank you for doing that because someday I might have gotten insane
