A few things, but it was a good poem. I did give it a 5|5, because it was amazing.

In the first stanza it was just spelling and stuff; neva = never, it makes it neater and not so slangy. I sunken= I'm sunken. hearts= heart has

Second stanza, only one thing; ". . . had drank too much." << take out had.

Other than that amazing poem. Best I've read so far of yours. Though only 3 today, it's still the best. (: