Breathes I Take

by Joshua Grider   Oct 29, 2007


Sometimes I breathe in air
but out goes life.

Surviving through a life
a life of strife.

Wondering what the next day brings
trying to survive from all these things.

I stand up tall I stand up strong
wishing deep inside for nothing to go wrong.

I climb a-top a mountain high
but only to find myself let out a sigh.

A sigh full of pain and anguish.

but sooner or later I'll have to find
the true self, myself, has in mind.

    report violation
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Latest Comments

  • 17 years ago

    by SH3S fiNAllY H3R3 l0V3 U N3NA

    Now this poem is amazing. The flow was good and the rhyming wads perfect. 5/5

    <mOnStRiTo'S pRiNcEsS>

  • 17 years ago

    by Hannah Mhairi

    I like it, thanxs 4 ur comment on my1 but i didn't really understand it, but thanx anyways:P.
    Really liked it though, 5/5

  • 17 years ago

    by Blease

    Great work

    can see where its coming from

  • 17 years ago

    by Nix

    To be honest I don't like rhyming too much in this poem, because it is typical and it seems little forced.
    Other than that I like topic of this piece and you expressed your emotions on excellent way.
    You also created good rhythm in it.

    -I climb a-top a mountain high
    but only to find myself let out a sigh.-

    ^This two lines are really fantastic and they adds very deep tone to this piece.

  • 17 years ago

    by Anthony

    I can feel the emotion in it
    I love the rhythm

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