Anger inside

My body is weak.
Tears wont stop rolling down my cheek.

I cannot take control of my anger left deep inside.
My mind and body keep telling me that I want to die.

I have moments where I smile and things are not blue.
But then I have moments where my body wont let me through.

It hurts me inside to see myself pushing me down.
I don't understand how I ;myself dont want me around.

I cannot let my body do this to me but my mind is going out of control.
Pretty soon its gonna be too late and I will have to pay the toll.

How can I get this horrible thoughts out of my head.
Thinking with my mind is something that I do dread.

You may think I'm crazy but I swear it is my mind.
I wish my anger inside was something that I could find.