Falling apart

by thegirltheydontsee   Nov 5, 2007


Name by*Animus*--check comments

as things slowly start to fall apart
i have to wonder what i could have changed
what cold have been
i wonder if i could have made it a better place
i guess ill never know

i wonder Ive showed a good chart
maybe things could have been rearranged
i wonder what should have been
i wish i had ran a better race
i guess it will never show

MEANING: don't waist your life away. make good choices.
*i wrote this when i was kinda in space...lol, but it may no make much sense, and I'm working on fixing it.*

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Latest Comments

  • Yeah it is a bit off and you should work on. There was a couple of grammatical errors. Keep it up.

    <mOnStRiTo'S pRiNcEsS>

  • 17 years ago

    by Animus

    A name......
    "Falling Apart"
    -Animus

  • 17 years ago

    by Behind Blue Eyes

    Well, to start off, you have a missing letter in this sentence :p
    "what cold have been"

    for this part, i dont quite understand the metaphors behind it... it's kinda confusing. you may need to go back and fix this a bit..
    "i wonder Ive showed a good chart
    maybe things could have been rearranged"

    and i think i have an idea of what you mean here, but im not quite sure...
    "i guess it will never show"

    let me know if you revise it! it's loved to see the final!

    <3ya girly