Very nice....love the rhyme scheme and flow....a well crafted dark poem with a lot of depth!

I enjoyed this one a lot. A very clever rhyme and nice flow. 5/5

Keep writing and smiling,

Ben

Wow very intense!! Great job!! 5/5

Very intense poem. I'm very greatful I stumbled across this poem .. it's very well written indeed.

Not often do you come across poems with such intensity and vibrant imagery. You master this well in this piece.

Solid structure to it, and flows really nicely. My only concern with it was that having set out your stall with really powerful and unique rhymes, you let it falter a little bit in the 2nd stanza.. "sleep - dreams" part.

It's only a very small problem, this poem is good enough to read again and again regardless.

Keep it up, I hope to see much more of your work.

~Pete.

This poem is interesting. i liked it. good job!
amanda