Numbness from my eyes to my toes
paired with the sinking feeling called unknown.
rebuilding the foundaton that was never really secure,
starting with my stomach,
my heart, my mind.
the idea of being fixed in the process -
the excitement, of accomplishment in the air.
the fear of losing what built it is much more terrifying.
you could be this.
or do this.
i don't want to lose my definition.
being ordinary is scary,
though it will live with me forever,
the one thing that makes it crumble is the wish.
the wish of acknowledgement,
support.
i've lost the desire of what used to keep the batteries running.
like i am half dead, trying.
things sink less lower than before.
i've lost my creativity.
i almost want somebody - or you
to know but oppurtunity knocks and the
mind is blank.
afraid of the unknown.
i am going normal, losing my separation.
scared.
don't wanna break down.
