Never

Fear.
I'm afraid that you'll whisper something new
in my ear.
Something still so false.
But it will make you look oh, so elegant.
And it will make up for all the times you
shouted the truth,
The words I never wanted to hear.

Pain.
I would scream to the starry night one more time
if it meant you would be gone from beneath the star
you promised me.
Remember?
It was so long ago.
You said you would never leave me alone in this
dark dark world,
and that the star would be just like you.
It would always shine.
Brighter, brighter.
But far away, higher than I could reach.
It wouldn't be next to me.
Could never be next to me.

Despair.
I cry alone when the sky doesn't seem so big.
When I don't feel like I'm suffocating beneath
all the memories we could have had
but never did.
Somewhere beyond daylight
my tears must mean something.
Somewhere where the sunshine doesn't just mean
that I've spent another day without you.
I would've found that place for you.
Somewhere beyond daylight.
I would've.
Would you have come with me?

Guilt.
I didn't do it.
I wasn't the one that decided to be indecisive.
I was there all along.
But did I do something wrong?
I squeezed your hand too tight.
But all I wanted was to keep you mine.
I stuttered when I spoke.
But you always knew what I was going to say.
I wasn't anything like her.
But you seemed happy with me...
It hurts to know
that I was so easily replaced.

Love.
Is lost.
Fearfully.
Painfully.
Despairingly.
Guiltily.
I had to let you go.
And that star?
It shines brighter still.
But not for me.
Never again for me.