Shut Your Mouth & Open Your Eyes

by Tammie   Nov 26, 2007


'You will be mine' is the last thing you said to me
But now you're gone, what do I do without you?
Filling that hole in my heart that's been waiting for so long
I begin to wait until you're promises fall through.

Lying awake here at 2am, totally exhausted, and I wish
I wish for this false hope to leave my mind without a trace
But I have a feeling it's not going anywhere tonight
The only image left in my failing mind is your face.

All this talk isn't doing me any good though
'Shut your mouth and open your eyes, he isn't coming back'
Harsh yet true, these words pierce through my heart
Falling to the ground I've got to get up and get back on track

Tears falling cease as eyes finally close quietly
Dreams, not nightmares, wash me away as sleep closes in
You're image remains, yet it is numbing slowly now
Moving on is painful, but tonight it's being kept within.

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Latest Comments

  • 16 years ago

    by Blissful

    Oh wow that final stanza just blew me away. It was a perfect way to end your wonderful poem. The imagery in this one was just wonderful and truly effective in getting your message across here. The saddness expressed were emotions I could relate with therefore I was consumed from your first sentence.

    Another poem with a great title that just caught my eye. Well done *5/5*

  • 16 years ago

    by Nix

    I am always totally honest in commenting so I have a few things that I don't like about this poem. This is just my opinion and I don't want to offend you if this piece emotionally means a lot to you but I think that it could be better.
    Rhyming is so typical and it seems forced which left really negative impression on me. Whole poem contains amount of feelings but you could express them on more powerful way with some unique metaphors. Also your word choice could be better and more creative and than you could manage to express your self on more captivating way.
    I really admire your writing in last stanza, I think that ending is fantastic but all in all nice work but it could use some improvements.

  • 16 years ago

    by SH3S fiNAllY H3R3 l0V3 U N3NA

    Oh my god, this poem was so sad. I can definately understand cause I was in a relationship somewhat like this, and u expressed the emotion really good. Great job! 5/5

    <mOnStRiTo'S pRiNcEsS>

  • 16 years ago

    by katy

    I really liked reading this poem, got into it so easily and it had so much rythm, i can feel ur emotion in it so much, i can tell this poem meant alot to u, well done xx 5/5

  • 16 years ago

    by Melpomene

    I really enjoyed this poem. You know why. Because I could feel this poem was written straight from the heart. It just poured over the paper and filled it with so many emotions. This was expressed deeply and portrayed so much within each stanza. This was painful. Yet touching.

    Well done a great poem which I have enjoyed reading. Keep up the good work. ~Mel

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