Butterfly

Beautiful poem..i liked it..but in the second line in this stanza....

"Butterfly, your wings shine like diamond stone
Always together, I bet you're never be alone
Morning time and you'll be ready for your roam
When it's dark, it's time for you to be back home"

"you're should be changed to "you'll"

but other than that great job.5/5

I love this poem! it is so beautiful. but the last line think could have been better and ended the poem on a more powerful note. I also think that throught the poem, you should keep the poem the same. sometimes you rhyme the first and second lines, and he third and fourth, other times the 1st, 2nd, 3rd and not the fourth and then other times all four lines rhyme. i think that this would make the piece even more powerful and easier to relate too. keep it up! :]

I loved the repitition that was definitly my favorite part. The poem was flawless. You truly have outdone yourself! The stanzas flowed elegently together. nice job
5/5
kaila

I thought this was a greatly penned poem, the rhyming was definetly good, and the word choice was magnifique, it was simply beau, the flow was smoothe, and it was just breath taking

Stephanie Naylor

I wish I could be the butterfly

"Butterfly, lately I wish I could be like you
You fly so free, you're colorful too"
Flows better^^

Butterfly, your wings shine like diamond stone
Always together, I bet you're never alone
Correct grammar^^

Butterfly, suddenly you're gone to another place
Soon you'll reach the high in the state of grace
Fly over the rainbow then you'll have everyone in daze
Your beauty shines, then and you everyone amazed
^^flows better, and correct grammar^

Butterfly, come and gone suddenly through the dawn
Back again and you bring the happiness all around
You bring sincerity through every person's heart
You show everyone that this life won't be too hard
^amazing^

Butterfly, soon you will find the right place to go
Beautiful place where love and happiness would grow
There will be a kindness of heart that you want to show
And your beauty will always be saved in the afterglow
^ correct grammar

amazing
5/5