Comments : To Death

  • 16 years ago

    by Jackie

    Wow, very dark and deep poem, it flows very well. Good poem 5/5

  • 16 years ago

    by June

    A sad but powerful write ,very good.

  • 16 years ago

    by Jenni Marie

    "All my pitiful existence
    with you by my side
    make yourself comfy
    in my soul you reside"

    ^^ Amazing opening there, so much intenisty and power wrapped up in few words, that immediately makes me want to continue reading.

    "You're the thorn in my side
    the pain in my head
    the weight on my chest
    my feeling of dread"

    ^^ I adore the imagery you painted in this stanza..beautifully detailed and it created such vivid visuals for me.

    "I bid you adieu
    inhale the last breath
    here's my submission letter
    address it : To Death "

    ^^ LOVE that stanza, easily the favourite part of the piece. I found that stanza alone to hold almost as much emotion and depth as all of the piece together, while simutaneously making for a beautiful intense ending.

    Your flow in this is perfect...it doesn't falter once, while the imagery is beautifully painted.

    Beautifully written.