I like your rhyme. A little bit sad, but interesting. I like the part: "If I am free from my torment of sin
Then why is it cannot find myself within

nice 5/5

Okay first i think in the second line in the fourth verse there should be an "I" in "why is it can not find myself" - like right after the it. that said, i love this poem - even tho some of the ending sort of just went over my head, the first verse was amazing, simple as it was. 5/5!

I really thing u should keep wrighting its a great poem great emtion 5/5 keep on keeping on.

I really liked this poem. Only one thing threw me off when reading it. Is your rhyme. In some places it was so effective, though you started rhyming the same word together like "sky" & "Sky" Aswel as "Grasp" which threw the flow off. I liked the emotional impact you planted within each line. It was heartfelt and touching. Overall an enjoyable read and even better without the same rhymes. Well done. ~Mel

Holy
cow

as i'm sure others have said, lines 1-4 are kinda bumpy, but they add to the unorthodox rhyme scheme which pulls your theme together better, becuase obiovlsly, there is no "orthodox" way to write these kind of poems. i quiete enjoyed this work of amazing literature that touched my soul, no joke, had shivers after i read it

i loooved it
5/5

Wow, it's really great poem...
Very enjoyable read...
The last stanza is the most powerful one...
Keep up the good work...
It's 5/5 of course...