This was a sad emotional piece. I found the flow to be almost chant like and eerie it created a nice effect over the atmosphere. Your word choice is simple, I like it and find it effective though I think that you could write really well by adding in stronger and more powerful vocab because you already have the flow and emotion down. Overall a good poem which I enjoyed. Well done. ~Mel

Nicely narrated ... and the story was a very well chosen one.. but differently told :)