Endlessly, She Said.

by Tammie   Dec 16, 2007


Excuse me miss, could you pass the sugar?
Your bitter words leave a terrible aftertaste.
[I thought you liked honesty at the best of times?]
You just never realised that now is the worst.

Sour flavoured candy canes and kisses
Ruin perfect moments and memories.
You pull just to push me back again and
Now your apologies are next to worthless.

I promise, I'll love you endlessly, she said.
But I beg to differ from experience.
And you can take this for all that it's worth;
She lies through a mouth full of golden plated teeth.

Spinning that web she so easily caught you in,
Something about that oh so perfect veneer,
Attracts you like a child to something shiny,
Now you're being childishly stubborn and won't let go.

From the beginning I've tainted reality.
But the sugar is too far out of reach this time and
You aren't there to save me like you used to.
Now it hurts more than ever but I'll be okay.

I'd be lying if I said that I didn't miss you,
But I know that I love you more than she ever did.
That will keep me warm at night with you gone,
And the fact that I know I'm not caught in your web.

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Latest Comments

  • 16 years ago

    by Fluffy

    Oh Tammie. This is just..woah. DUDE. I LOVED it. This is SO my kind of thing! How glad am I that you chose this poem for me to read? VERY GLAD. Hahaha :p.

    Ok. The very first line is just brilliant; you immediately cause the reader to question, which is an impressive and important quality. The way in which you continue and hold the words so beautifully together is just amazing. The use of brackets to emphasize the depth of the third line is really effective, and you seem to continue with this very powerful diction throughout.

    "From the beginning I've tainted reality.
    But the sugar is too far out of reach this time" = Marvellous.

    Dude. I am actually at a loss of words. Everything, every detail within this piece was just spot on and so direct. I didn't have to read it twice to reassure myself of the meaning; you made it so clear what you were saying through your use of simple language. There are many potential poets who lose themselves in a web of words trying to create one majestic line, then the following one ends up very weak - why? Because they don't keep it simple. And keeping it simple is what makes the poem effective, funnily enough.

    I'm going to end my babbling. This was an amazing and very impressive write, Tammie. I am PROUD. Well done (: x

  • 16 years ago

    by Boy

    I'd be lying if I said that I didn't miss you,
    But I know that I love you more than she ever did.

    it realy relates to me... i like ur poetry good work...

  • 16 years ago

    by NyellMoonlight

    Omg... Wow... speechless...
    I need some time to get my brain functions back lol
    This is absolutely amazing, soaked in sarcasm and truly excellently written. Whole poem is filled with original thoughts. The atmosphere that you created is powerful and whole poem holds very deep meanings. I like the metaphorical content.
    I can't choose my favorite stanza, whole piece is just breathtaking.
    Excellently done!

  • 16 years ago

    by Nix

    Interesting topic, I love this piece, it is very unqiue and written on so good way, you did truly fantastic job! I absolutely love that ending line and the choice of words is incredible, original too.
    All in all I must say wonderful poem, very deep and filled with amazingly expressed emotions.

  • 16 years ago

    by damont

    Wonderful poem. excellent. the details were already said by slave to the music. still well keep writing

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