What am i supposed to do

What am i supposed to do, am i supposed to forget about you, stop loving you, stop thinking about you, be happy. cuzz i cant be, i cant let you go, and ill never allow myself to forget about you.but i want to be able to hear your name, and think about you without crying, i want to feel the happiness that i once felt when i heard you voice, or felt the warmth of your touch. i want to laugh like we did when we played outside for hours pretending we were spies, never thinking that you wouldn't be here for the rest of our lives. but brother although I'm at a loss of what to do or how to make this unbearable pain stop, i know that no matter what I'll always love you.
to my awsome brother.