Cofessions of a modern day Calamity;

[Prologue; Observations.]

There's a time and place in every persons life where they know from that moment on nothing will ever be the same; perspectives change, everyday activities or tasks complicate, relationships falter. At this particular second, everything seems concentrated on you, like somebody took a picture and zoomed in all the way, noting your every flaw in clear digital emphasis. Now threw the course of your lifetime mistakes have been made, horrible decisions that you know would catch up to you one day; this is the day. Sadly, it's not like the movies; no flattering close ups, no cliché lines; just disappointment and the sheer feeling of failure.

The pressure to run and hide is ominous, a crushing wave of potential tragedies, and observe how the reactions of each human are all the same. From the devoted wife who just received the news her husband had been unfaithful for the last three years, to the over zealous mother who's 15 year old daughter just "came out". A ended relationship, a broken family, a newly divorced mother of four; the list is endless. They struggle to breathe.

And from then on as the days pass you either grow or die, your depression stunting your ability to smile, or your new knowledge of what's happened allows you to learn. People sometimes don't understand the fact that life isn't some book that can just be rewritten, there is no magic eraser or divine plan; it's just you. Teens, and some adults, like to make believe that tomorrow everything will be ok, that if they say sorry or 'make up' for it, the thing(s) they've done will just disappear. Sadly they haven't exactly perfected the technology needed for a time machine, a sad disapointment in such a situation. Magic, happy endings, true love, a flawless family life; they don't exist, they never will. But we can always hope, right?

I wonder, if there was no god to save you, no spiritual crutch- do you think the world could survive one day without going into utter chaos? If there was no bible, no church, would the mother of that girl still hate her so? Would things be any different? What if you had one chance to take it all back, to make things better; what if you could undue the biggest mistake in your life? To bad you cant�ladies and gentlemen, welcome to my life.