No like you said it not perfect, but its pretty good. if i were you id be pretty happy with this one! its good and flows nice. and poetry for me is getting whats on ur mind and ur feelings out and u have certainly done a good job of that! well done
xx
Taegan Emily

Well I absolutely loved it. Sure it seemed kind of rocky, but I absolutely loved it. Especially the way you wrote it. Good job! 5/5

.:CiNdY:.

It was short, sweet, and to the point. I do think you could add some more emotions to it to make it more real but the way you have it is okay too. I will have to give you a *4/5* because it can be improved on and I know you can do it!

Dat is good, I felt so related to this. I used to feel that so much in my past, man, a lot and I am thinkin writing abt it. Gurl, u r so so good!

I loved the first stanza in every line. It really spoke out to me. I think that if you go with this and improve for the next piece.
You'll do great!
5/5
kaila