Why I Don't Sleep

Is there any more pride left in my heart to just keep trying
or will all these lies that you hear just kill me instantly
this is not intended you make you feel a certain way
this is just for myself so i at lest have some clarity
i slept in my own bed its been a few months since
i could muster up the strength to not think you of while i sleep
when i woke up i was a fog of left over passion and memories
when i realized where i laid my head to rest i started to cry
not to the fact that it was our bed, but of these broken dreams
its been a long journey without you and its been so long since i have held you
and this long dark road that i use to know seems so empty and unknown
its been a long journey wishing you were here and its been so long since i have been wanting you near and this long dark road that i use to know I'm sick of driving down it
now awake with tears rolling down my cheek
i whispered you name softly to ease the pain inside
i squeeze my pillow holding on to our life that we use to have
as my hands turned red and my face grew pale
i knew that theres no more pride left and I'm sure i have failed
so i scream from the top of my lungs wishing you would hear my cries
but i know you would never hear them so they go unheard
and when i try to get out of our bed i just find myself crashing
into another dream of you
its been a long journey without you and its been so long since i have held you
and this long dark road that i use to know seems so empty and unknown
its been a long journey wishing you were here and its been so long since i have been wanting you near and this long dark road that i use to know I'm sick of driving down it

the dreams i have of you are like living in paradise
there is no one there but us
you would run through the fields and yell with excitement
as the sun falls the skies look as if there on fire
and we are laying in our bed holding hands and we look deep into one anthers eyes
and in that moment our souls touch and our hearts dance with ecstasy
as your eyes start to swell my through begins to dry
as i lean in for one last kiss i wake up and I'm alone