Im the daughter you never met..

I know you've never really been there.
Never really saw me grow up.
But I know, that if you were here now.
You'd take one look at me & wonder how I did it.
I've become the young lady that my mom has always dreamed about, without you by my side.
She never thought it would happen, never saw someones heart so strong.
Without you, it's been hell.
I've gone through life, not knowing what it's like to have you by my side, & the dreams, couldn't even begin to bring you closer.
You'd take one look, & think what everyone else thinks.
You wouldn't see me, you'd see me for who you think I am.
I've grown up without you by my side, wiping away my tears at night, holding my hand through things, & hiding my face when something scary happens.
The emptiness of not having a father, kills me more & more everyday.
You don't know what it's like, seeing people with their dad, or hearing them say how much they hate their dad ..
All because he didn't give them what they wanted, wishing he would just go away.
It's crazy how many people take their fathers for granted, & when I'd give my last breath, just to see your face.
I'd kill to have you here, by my side at night.
Mom wont even talk to me about you, which makes it that much harder.
I have a step dad, he's a good guy, but I always try to compare him to you .. It's hard when there is no one to compare too.
I go to sleep at night, thinking about what you would do if you knew about me.
I've tried so hard to find you, & so much harder to talk to mom about you, but she always pushes it aside, & points out how good I've done without you there, but she doesn't really see it.
Mom .. She doesn't look deep enough, & when she does, she pushes it out of the way.
I wonder what it would be like if you knew about me.
If it would be different, or just like it is.
Wonder if you would even care, or be right there.