Comments : One in a million

  • 16 years ago

    by black winchester

    Woow that's just amazing....brilliant..good job..KUDOS t'ya..

  • 16 years ago

    by Ares

    Veldig bra!!! Mejet bra!

  • 16 years ago

    by CountlessMoments

    Nice, nice. great job! keep writing poems. your good at it!!

  • 16 years ago

    by Natalie

    This is a very interesting poem indeed. The very title is captivating as not everyone or everything is "One in a million."

    "why do we get accused, when we the ones that got abused"

    This line grasps the reader because it is one of truth telling. In this world we live it is often the victims who continue to suffer long after the crime has been committed. Very well written. Food for thought.

    "I only got one life to live, struggling to survive,
    in a world filled with agony - am i able to forgive ? "

    This stanza in your poem is extremely heart-felt and thus keep the reader wanting to read more. We all have issues we need to forgive but can we?

    "Nightmares of people screaming -
    living in bad conditions ain't nobody dreaming."

    I feel that your character is suffering in ways beyond herself. You make reference to the world and how messed up it is. The imagery behind the line, "Nightmares of people screaming" is really intense. Very well written.

    "slowly I've become everything I've been fighting.
    Slowly I've become shameless.
    Slowly I've become - one a them ! "

    A very dark ending but at least one of realisation. A great concept.

    I believe this is, in essence, a great poem. You do, however, need to check some of the grammar (though I am not one to talk) and most importantly, try not to rhyme so much. It takes away from the intensity of your poem.

    Sorry if I am a bit harsh but I do believe u have the template for a great poem here.

    Please have a read of my poems and let me know what u think.

    Natalie