I feel suffocated.
I feel like I can't control anything i do or say.
Like I'm a doll.
And someone keeps playing games with me,
the kind of games where the story is tragic
but the ending is beautiful.
But I don't see the beautiful ending.
and there is no one controlling it.
Just me.. just me..
Just me and my selfish dumb actions and words.
I don't know why I snap.
I wish it'd just stop.
I just wish I was different.
I wish to be normal.
And loved.. really loved.. for me.
Not for the daughter.
Or sister.
Or friend.
But just plain me.
So suddenly.
The monster springs forth from my mouth,
Raging it's fiery hate
Into the souls of those i care most for.
Filling their hearts with dismay.
Leaving them troubled, baffled, stifled.
And me in common regret.
I don't want to hurt anyone anymore.
It's that simple,
And yet, that difficult.
