Avoiding The Unattainable

by FlawlesslyTarnished   Jan 18, 2008


Avoiding the unattainable
She's throwing off her flow
Her life no longer balanced
From the way she normally goes

Nothing she does will ever suffice
And the failure, she'll avoid
The unattainable success
And by now, she's been destroyed

She's stuck in these predicaments
And she's seen all her flaws
She cries herself to sleep at night
As she's throwing up her walls

Non lasting friendships and deceitful love
Because of this, her feelings suppressed
Her deeply kept secrets remain concealed
And soon she becomes even more depressed

All her hopes and dreams are out of reach
And the cause is unexplainable
And so she shall forever be
Avoiding the unattainable

-I don't think it's my best work.
And was the flow kind of rocky?

© 2008 WilTED.

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Latest Comments

  • 16 years ago

    by BlueEyedMystery

    Another sad poem! :[[ You're making me depressed! Haha, that's okay though, beause I loved this poem! ^.^

    You're right the flow was a little rocky. The rhymes were also a little off, but DON'T change it, because I don't want you using rhymes that feel forced. I hate it when people do that.

    And she's seen all her flaws
    ^^I normally don't like "and's" in poems, but I really think it works here.

    Great job!

    Cayce xx

  • 16 years ago

    by Michelle18

    I dont think the flow was rocky at all... to me it was flawless.... i loved it.. i sometimes feel this way..and you did an excellent job explaining it. 5/5 from me. =]

  • 16 years ago

    by SH3S fiNAllY H3R3 l0V3 U N3NA

    Well this poem was just amazing. It had so much emotion in this. It had the best emotion ever and the feeling in it was just great. I'm definately going to add this in my favs. Great job! 5/5

    .:CiNdY:.

  • 16 years ago

    by TaKe Me As I Am

    Another great poem! You can truly feel the emotion in your poetry..

  • 16 years ago

    by AllHailTheHeartbreaker

    Beautiful work; absolutely lovely. The flow was really well, and the poem's beginning stanza has a way of drawing the reader in. Great write, keep it up!

    [</3er]

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