Aww this is such a sad poem the first stanza is great which is gd cus it made me finish the poem which was great..keep writing!!...=)..5/5

First off, I loved the title! It really captured my attention and I was curious to read more. The thing that stuck to me the most here was your flawless use of imagery ... you really hooked me in as the reader and I was left wanting more.

I loved what you had to say .. sometimes we all feel like we're the star that has yet to shine. You expressed it beautifully.

Well done *5/5*

I really like this one my favorite part was:

Perfect timing and position high upon the clear night sky,
hoping at least one person will see as I fly by.
Only once I get to shoot, and then that's it for me...

Especially the you only get one shot part.
Its true we all have lifes. And we want to make the best of it.. cause we only have one...

well amazing poem. I didn't find anything wrong with it. your emotion and the way your described it was great

excellent job :)

5/5

This is a unique poem, I like the meaning beneath it and the emotion you portrayed throughout is very fluid. I think that it did go on a bit, but I was interested the whole way through.

In the fourth stanza this line is bit off for me;
'I'm just wasting in space wasting space in spaceless-ness'
I think you say space too much, and I understand the way you wrote it to be like that, but it didn't really appeal to me. I think it was a bit hard to read. But if you do leave it, just put a comma in between the 'wasting space[,] wasting space in spaceless-ness'.

I enjoyed this write. But keep your head up and don't loose hope, it is important. 5/5

Tammie

Wow... I love this write from the beginning to the end. You expressed emotions on a great way.
The descriptions are fantastic through the whole piece, very original. They created truly vivid imagery in my mind.
I can relate to this poem in a way.
Your choice of words is good in each stanza and the flow and rhythm are unusual but great.
My favorite stanza is;

- Hopelessly existing in this gravity-less hell
while every hour upon hour my cold heart becomes a shell;
Dreams of shooting far across the pristine-lit night sky
become a distant memory of times where hope was still alive.-
^^
Very effective

This poem holds equal amounts of beauty and sadness within which makes it very captivating.
The only thing I don't like are rhymes, I think that they're too typical on some places.
All in all, fantastically done!
5/5 from me

I will be totally honest in this comment. I just want to tell that this is just my personal opinion and I don't want to offend you with anything.

-The Shooting Star That's Never Seen-
^Nice title, very captivating and it is the good opening for this poem.

-Trying hard to not just be
the shooting star no one can see;
I'm trying hard to be someone
and not just drown alone.-
^This stanza did not grabbed my attention at all, rhyming in it isn't original and it seems somehow forced, I think that some powerful, unique metaphor would me much better for first lines of this piece. Just this fourth lines were predictable and not interesting too me.

-I want to make a footprint in the sand upon the earth;
Although I try it's always wiped away with the high-rising surf.-
^Excellent lines, this is the part of the poem when I start to like it, superb choice of words and you said this on very creative way which is great cause you expressed your self on truly moving way.

-I'm trying hard to turn into
a star that makes wishes come true;
I'm trying hard to glisten; shimmer
--All I ever do is flicker...-
^I don't like repetition of-I'm trying hard-, it left a negative impression on me simply cause I think that it is too simple and I personally don't like your the way that you express that but in the same time it was touching but it could be even better if it is more effective.

-For one million years I have waited to shine
but I can't foresee light in my life anytime;
I'm just wasting in space wasting space in spaceless-ness
as everyone flies with shooting stars of brilliance.-
^Rhyme shine - anytime totally throw me off, I don't like typical rhymes, I think if you want to rhyme than be original but other than that this stanza is excellent.

-Do I lack the fire?
Do I lack a flame?
Without wick am I just set to rot my life away?-
Super lines, very nice part that in my head made this piece very compact.

-Hopelessly existing in this gravity-less hell
while every hour upon hour my cold heart becomes a shell;
Dreams of shooting far across the pristine-lit night sky
become a distant memory of times where hope was still alive-
Wow! This part is absolutely brilliant, mind-blowing image is mixed with emotions that are expressed in fantastic way and I admire your writing in this stanza. Bravo.

-
Perfect timing and position high upon the clear night sky,
hoping at least one person will see as I fly by.
Only once I get to shoot, and then that's it for me...-
^Greatly written except I don't like-and then that's it for me- cause I think that it could sound more interesting with different shape of that sentence.

-I guess that I will always be the shooting star that's never seen.-
^Perfect ending, it posses breath-taking beauty and amount of emotions and sadness, wow!

Now all in all I must say that I enjoyed in this poem, you wrote it with such passion and beauty, it touched me deeply. I just think that it could be even better with some improvements but overall I must congrats you on writing this poem, and the fact that you wrote this piece with such honesty and managed to describe hard feelings is impressing.
Keep writing, well done.

So much pain was spread throughout this whole piece. I can relate to this so much. Wow! That was beautiful. 5/5

I'd say it is about time that I comment this. I will be off to do the other one later tonight. I must say, I love this title. For a sad poem ecspecially, definintly [sp] caught my eye. So on to the wonderful job of commenting (:

[copy and paste]
First stanza: Honostly, I must say that your first stanza was not the eye catching omg omg type of thing I expected with a title like this. Although it wasn't out there, it still set the mood or tone for the entire peice. Which is great so early on in the peice.
One thing that was great too, was your flow. The rhyme scheme was original but not forced. I did like the last two lines and to my suprise you did not use punctuation to your advantage [yet anyways]

Second stanza: I loved these lines. The rhyme is consistant as your peice progresses and I do not thing the decrease in lines is an issue at all. I actually think that this particular format or whatever it is called worked [perfectly] for this one...
I can't say anything else, but I loved it. Amazingly beautiful.

Third stanza: First line, I think that you can use a comma to transition into the second line. It would cause a slight pause and keep the flow smooth. But your punctuation is back. Yay. Oh man and you used it to the fullest extent in this stanza.
I love the word choice in this particular one, the word glimmer and flicker. Truly amazing. I loved it :]]

Fourth stanza: Aww. The first two lines in this stanza were sad. Honostly, I can relate and this feeling sucks. I was wondering if foresee is two words or one how you have it. It is really bothering me. Hmm. It just looks weird to me.
Anyways, I love the third line. Oh so wonderful in its repetition-ness. Honostly it is. But, one thing is I think that maybe there could be a comma between the two wasting spaces. I have an issue with commas don't you think? Lol. Oh my and the last line.
Frowns. Oh my. Its breathtakingly sad. Overall, another amazing stanza...

Fifth: Well, this stanza kinda took the flow of its wonderfully smooth track. Not a complete wreck but a little sidetracking. If my weirdo speaking makes any sense at all. Not a tremendous flaw but it sure is a nice stanza :]]

Sixth: Your poem is starting to depress me. Gezze. Stephen, I think this is my favorite stanza from this peice. The emotion is so well thought out and real that it hit me right there. In the heart I mean.
The flow was smooth with great wording. Just wonderfully flawless..

Seventh: You used you punctuation in a simple yet effective way here. In my opinion that is. And the line that is after that all alone is a wonderful way to sum it all up.

Hun, overall this is an amazing sad peice. Other than what mistakes I pointed out earlier it blew me away. So great job. 5.5

Btw, I wrote this is a word type document so I did not loose it once. Thanks for the advice.
Amber.

That was brilliant expressed and written with such emotion you younger people have obviously got alot on yolur minds. Enjoy your life mate you only live once and have confidence in everything you do. You are very talented you dont just flicker when it comes to poetry. x

Wow steven this is amazing!!! You are the best poet i have ever met your poems are so amazing and inspiring.. Great job!!! 5/5

This poem was beyond beautiful..it was fantastic!!
i was glued to every word.
you did a wonderful job!
i also dont kno anybody who has as many poems as you do!! lol
yer a true writer, and a great one at that.

I really like this poem...it has so much meaning...excellent work! I cried as well....

-Do I lack the fire?
Do I lack a flame?
Without wick am I just set to rot my life away?-

Beautiful poem, really enjoyed it. Very well written. can't say i remember this poem:) but i'm sure i'll remember when i read them!

xxx

Okay, Two words for this poem. Absolutely Amazing! :)

I can see why this is your favourite.
I love it. :)
Great work, as always..