All over again (true story)

That night I sat so still
Quivering with fears
I no longer had the will
To carry on these tears

My favourite song on repeat
The tune a blurry haze
With every pained last heartbeat
I slipped into a daze

Scattered on my bed they lay
Quartz stones of death
This was my final day
My final lonely breath

One by one I took them whole
So violently I shook
Nobody knew, not a soul
How many I had took

Heat began to rise and burn
Flushing my hot cheeks
My vision began to bend and turn
Fell to the floor so weak

I lay on my bedroom floor
Wishing my life away
No more pain to now endure
No more unhappy days

The light began to fade to black
Slumped against the wall
Of the world, I lost track
In my peaceful fall

When my eyes dared to open
Bright lights flooded in
Not a word could be spoken
At last,no pain within

At last i was rid of life
Rid of pointless lies
Rid of bleeding, rid of strife
Rid of all i despise

The mist before me began to clear
Pale faces on the right
The pain again started to sear
I screamed with silent fright

So many machines choking me
Men in white coats
Horrorfied, struggling to be free
A deadly antidote

Red lights above my head
White angels dash and hurry
Surrounding me in my bed
The world a distant flurry

As I opened my stining eyes
I recognised the place
My family gave relieved sighs
Worry on their face

Softly I began to weep
My failed suicide
All this pain again to keep
More torture to hide

Tonight again I sit so still
Quivering with fears
Tonight, my pain I'll finally kill
Tonight, I might get near

This a true story of whats happenned to me in the last few weeks, for everybody out there who feels like this, just hang on in there, iv had 4 failed suicides so far, but I still have hope that things will get better, and they will.

For those of you who feel like i have felt, even though it doesn't feel like it right now, one day you'll be able to live one day without any pain, you can beat it! I know its hard to be strong 24/7 xxx enough waffling from me now!