What if the cure is what makes me sick
What if what kills me also makes me tick?
It makes me feel alive but it makes me so numb
It's a beautiful secret that makes me feel dumb
It causes this pain deep in my core
A tear in my soul that didn't exist before
I don't think I'm ever ok but I'll pretend to be
The devices I use help me stand yet smother me
I look inside and see myself failing
I feel myself crying as I am exhaling
I feel promises on their way to broken
I taste the lies in words yet unspoken
It makes my skin itch and my eyes burn
Makes my hands shake, will I ever learn?
To not be so hasty about opening that door
In my heart I can feel the fires rise and soar
I have to admit its me tearing me apart
I'd like to say its the end but its just the start
I see hope floating on the horizon of morning
But in front of my eyes is nothing but mourning
Will it be enough that I feel its the path of my life?
That alone making it worth enduring the strife?
I gave away something that wasn't even mine
Deceiving me with its fake appeal and shine
There is no escaping my self destruction
The one thing in life for which I need no instruction.
