Wow, I love this poem!

Darkness covers my crying heart
Mind concealed in a raging cloud
Life are not as they where in the start
Every part of my body cries out loud

That stanza was amazing, I loved your flow and your emotion was so powerful! Great choice of words. You explain your feelings so clearly!

5/5

Amazing.

"Life was once lighten by happiness"
i think it would sound better as
"Life was once lit by happiness"

"Life are not as they where in the start"
change to
"Life is not what it was at the start"
i believe that is the correct grammar

"To walk on glass with bleeding feet
To cross the skies with broken wings
To swim an infinite ocean of flames
This is living, all those painful things"

the way that stanza flowed, was amazing. I actually went and read this over and over after i finished the poem!

"Darkness has become a way of living
Emotions are dead
Shattered heart is now bleeding
All life powers are leaving instead"

I think the second line in this is too short, compared to how the poem has been written. maybe think about changing it to something like
"Darkness has become a way of living
Emotions seem to be dead
Shattered heart is now bleeding
All life powers are leaving instead"

these are just my thoughts, and the way i percieve the poem. All writers see things differently.
but i hope i could have helped.

5/5

Nice poetry. i like this poem it's kinda like ones i wright. i like the part of
"To walk on glass with bleeding feet
To cross the skies with broken wings
To swim an infinite ocean of flames
This is living, all those painful things"

amazing and i love it. 5/5 !props!

In your poem, I lived the pain i'm feeling again and again.

i'm related to it in al lways.

the flow and words are amazing

keep it up

good luck
5/5

WOW... this is amazing... i think i might have mommented this befor, by this is for the comment chain, and i LOVE this poem... WOW i can't think of anything else to say... perfect flow by the way, i really loved the wording, this piece is so powerful, and heartfelt, i can feel the pain, truely amazing... 5/5

Beautiful, this was an amazing write. Your choice of words were so powerful, and everyy line captures the reader! Simply amazing!

Wow! such emotions carved in every stanza... damn!
my fav stanza is:
"To walk on glass with bleeding feet
To cross the skies with broken wings
To swim an infinite ocean of flames
This is living, all those painful things"

damn.. original detailed descriptions! great poem! =]

Really very well written. So meaningful and deep.

Life was once lit by happiness
Days were always so bright back then
I remember those unrealistic days
Now it seems I'm empty again
^so easy for me to lose myself in this stanza because I could truly relate with what you said ... beautifully written!

"To walk on glass with bleeding feet
To cross the skies with broken wings
To swim an infinite ocean of flames"
^WOW.... that was so unique and unlike anything I've read in a while.... flawless use of imagery.

This has to be my fave from the two ... it was heartbreakingly wonderful. Well done *5/5*

Wow, this poem left me completely breathless. It has so much feeling in it. The flow was just amazing. The wording was absolutely amazing. Great job!

.:CiNdY:.

This was an amazing write. :] i absolutely loved it all. And I can't pick a -favorite- stanza because I liked them all so much! lol. This was beautiful and very nicely written. It all flowed so well and everything just. .fit, you know. Anyway. amazing job .5/5.

You managed to show your feelings with kinda 'sharp' methaphors so it very strong

your poem is full of thorough images like "the ocean of flames",

but i've noticed the last stanza is not like all the others. it could be something like:

Meeting you has made me blind and weak
It's the reason I can't stand tall
And of the tears falling with every blink.
Please leave me alone, and let me fall

but of course it's just my opinion :)

You know, love is so painful. Seems like every time you get in a relationship, it ends in a way you did not expect it to end, or at least not the way you wanted it to. Love, a dangerous, dangerous, and weary road. I say this so many times, and I will say it again. There is no cure for heartbreak. I really wish there was though.

You know, this poem reminded me of my past relationships. Where, I really thought that "they" were the once. Where, I really thought like a fool "This is it, this is the real thing". To find out by the end that is was just some... teenage adolescent infatuation you know?

I mean, what do you do about it? I remember how I felt. Just like your poem. I felt the dwelling darkness of my abysmal emotions get the best of me. I felt like the swimming oceans, infinite oceans of fire. That was my life, my world.

You captured my eyes, my imagination, my past memories. You called out to me in this poem. You really did, and the best part? Is that I sensed all that emotions that was once thought forgotten, remembered.

It all came back to me, whether that is a good thing, or not. You actually did it, and that left me very impressed. I really did feel the poem. I really did.

_[Deathly'Amore]

I enjoyed reading this very very much. It was very emotional. The flow of off just a little tiny it, but the rhymes were superb. Everything rhymed just perfect. :]

To walk on glass with bleeding feet
To cross the skies with broken wings
To swim an infinite ocean of flames
This is living, all those painful things
^^Favorite stanza! :]

Please leave me alone, and let me fall
^^Loved that line too.

Cayce xx

Very well written.... amazing... keep writing!

Another amazing poem! I am highly impressed with your work. It is very detailed and you have an excellent description too. Very vivid in everything. I must say that the fourth stanza was definitely my favorite. [:

This is a sad one. But I still liked it. Another 5/5 =D