Now its time to say goodbye
I know it will cause pain
But I've been driven to do this
Let me explain .... !
I feel unwanted and unloved
I just get pushed away
Unless someone wants something
I'm simply left a stray.
I love my family deeply
And treasure my friends too
I'd like to say how sorry i am
And a big thank you.
My pain is to unbearable
This is the only way,
I've just got something else
Something more to say ...
This girl came home from college
And decided to end her life
So she went in the kitchen
And pulled out that knife....
She wrote a suicide note
Saying To anyone that Care's
At the end of the letter
She burst out into tears.
The suicide note read :
If you've found this letter
I'm no longer here
I died quite peacefully
And in no fear
I needed to get away
escape
flee
I needed to do this just for me !
I had indescribable feelings
That know one understood,
They hurt me to much
And i was misunderstood
You thought i could do this
And act like nothing happened
But by god you were wrong
When it lies in my head.
All the upset people caused me
Made these feeling appear
Pain
Guilt
Shame
They're all up here ^^^.....
The memory boxes in my head
Came to haunt me everyday
They re-opened old scars
And left new ones on there way
I was an 18 year old girl
Who's childhood was stolen,
I was a teenager and an adult
Who's life was truly broken.
I had that smile on my face
That smile that was fake,
I looked like a normal girl
Not one who was about to break !
I couldn't bring myself close
Close to anyone at all
I was scared of being hurt again
All i ask is why ?
Why couldn't we talk like mother and daughter ?
Instead you looked at me through shame,
You made me feel dirty
Even though i wasn't to blame !
I'm not to blame for what those people did
I know I'm not deep inside
But you made me feel that way
Because of the way you looked at me.
I'm sorry i can't explain everything
But there just isn't enough time
I really have to go now
No-one was to blame but ME.
Don't worry mum
I didn't die in pain,
Tell everyone i love them
And I'm sorry again !
I took out that knife
And swallowed those pills,
Slowly i drifted away
As my life i did kill.
I've finally escaped this life
I'm in a better place,
I can no longer be
Your only disgrace.
