Triangular Form

by Veamm   Feb 1, 2008


Heartbreak
shattered in pieces
more leaks
it squeezes

triangle form
side to sides
melt like a storm
and deep wide

leave aside
form of discard
twisted inside
that I can't hide

This one is an abstract but please understand the hidden message on it!

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Latest Comments

  • 16 years ago

    by Lemma

    I like that this poem is abstract, it made me look for a meaning beyond the words that were written on the page. The rhyming wasn't consistent but it didn't really matter because it read well anyway due the good flow.

    Em xXx

  • 16 years ago

    by Lizaveta

    This was pretty laconic but meaningful. every word has a lot of meaning and poetic imagery, and that is what i loved most in your way of writing in this poem.
    the way your ideas dance around form is unusual and eye-catching, for example in these lines:
    shattered in pieces
    more leaks
    it squeezes
    triangle form

    and in the end you tell us what is inside :
    "twisted inside
    that i can't hide"
    - and both this form thing and inside thing tell us a lot about how you feel and somehow it made me feel quite the same while reading it.
    you really did a great job.
    5/5

  • 16 years ago

    by WrittenInTheStars

    Good poem. I like the way you used so few words yet you said so much. I like this poem. It's different than what people usually write. Very interesting. 5/5

  • 16 years ago

    by L0V3 Mi fAMilY

    I saw the hidden message.
    She broke your heart!
    I'm sorry bud, u'll get through it!
    It's really good!
    5/5

  • 16 years ago

    by StandStill

    Beautiful. i really do like the choppy. i think that with an abstract peice, everyone can get a beauty and can find their own message....good job. <3