Screaming

The tears fell
A steady stream
My heart broke
I let out a scream
I tore my room to pieces
Looking for things of you
And once I found them all
I knew just what to do
I found a sharp pair of scissors
Looked at them with menacing eyes
And with every slash of them
I thought of the lies
All the times you promised love
And how you said you'd be here
And when you told me that I'd never
Have a single thing to fear
Well look at me
In the mess
Can you help me
Did I pass the test?
Am I as fearless as you imagined
Am I exactly what you wanted
Look into my eyes and see
See for yourself that I am haunted
Haunted by the torment
Of being every thing you needed
And my eyes
I tell you how they were bleed-ed
You ripped the tears
Out from the inside
You didn't care
About how I cried
You sat there and said
What I knew you would
You said things
You thought you could
You figured you could say anything
Just get away with murder
Just look at your face
You thought 'I can't hurt her'
You thought I was strong
But I guess it wasn't enough
Somewhere inside
I wasn't tough
I was just a sad little girl
Wanting someone to hold
And someone to tell stories
Of things I've been told
But you couldn't keep me safe
And nor did you want to
You wanted to do what you could
And see what you could do
You wanted to murder
Someone deep down
To see if they could still smile
Hiding a frown
And boy I did it as long as I could
I pretended I was happy, to make you so
And in the end I fell apart
It didn't matter who
Who the hell you were
Or what you did
Or what kind of things
You wanted to be hid
I couldn't just make everything ok
I couldn't pretend any longer my dear
And I know that this isn't
What you wanted to hear
But so what, who cares
I'm saying it anyway
Because I can't pretend any more
Not one more damn day
I sat in your room
And cried on your shoulder
Somewhere in your mind
Something said "hold her"
And so you did
But that didn't work well
You couldn't pick me up
Though your the reason I fell
So here I go,
Living without you
And I'll pick myself up
If its the last thing I do