You all laugh at me because Im strange.
I laugh at you all because you're so normal

Im not really mad. Only northbynorthwest and a little to the right

Human nature- I'm resigned to it.

If you're going to tell a few people a secret, you might as well announce it to the world. They'll learn about it anyway.

I'm not complaining about your personality. I'm merely observing the way you are.

Good news will stay and bad news will refuse to leave.
Tevye- Fiddler on the roof

Give a man fire and he will be warm for a day.
Set a man on fire and he'll be warm for the rest of his life.
- Some guy from Amsterdam

I'm not lazy I'm just reluctant to work.

If God hadn't wanted man to fly he would have punished him.

If God had wanted man to smoke he would have set him on fire.