Don't be too serious about life, its not like you're gettin' out alive.

What the DUCK?

God is coming and boy, is she pissed!

My mother never noticed the irony when she called be a son of a *****.

Okay kiddies! Remember: Fat people are harder to kidnap.

Look! It's the leaning tower of Sharpie!

(said by my ex bf Dakota while stacking markers)

I'm not perfect, but I'm workin' on it.
-McDonald's Bag

WWJB
"Who would Jesus Bomb?"

Does it bug anyone else that people ask what time it is when there's a clock 5 inches away from them???

I really do hope that one day, he will give up on asking me out, can't he see that I'm too good for him???