Ok..Easter..Jesus was nailed to a cross..and died..and then came back to life..so now we eat chocolate bunnies?I mean..HELLLLOOOOO!!! What is the point of this??

Whatsa difference between a grocery bag and michael jackson?

One is plastic and unsafe for children and the other one holds your groceries.

If your parents never had children, chances are you won't either.

Im the kind of kid my parents don't want me to hang out with!

Only in America...do we buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns in packages of eight...

Only in America...do banks leave both doors open and then chain the pens to the counters...

Only in America...do people order double cheese burgers, a large fry, and a diet coke...

Only in America...do we use answering machines to screen calls and then have call waiting so we won't miss a call from someone we didn't want to talk to in the first place...

Only in America...can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance...

Only in America...do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway and leave useless things and junk in boxes in the garage...