Sweet pain my only salvation,
Crimson; the colour of my dreams,
Carefully destructive I sketch the hate,
Carving the bars of my self-inflicted prison.

Feelings of dread overcome me,
Wicked despair has lain across my heart,
In my mind I'm lost; I cannot see,
Evil demons choke me in the dark.

Sometimes it is the greatest strength to give in to that which we perceive as weakness, and fight those actions which make us feel strong.

Marry me in black and bury me in white.

Bloodstains on my clothes will wash away,
But the stains on my heart are here to stay.

I have found what I am looking for. I know what I must do. Where I go, you cannot follow. Do not miss me, for I will have no memory of you.

I am nothing.
Nothing I am.
Am I nothing?

I hate my hate.
I despise my love.
I loathe my fear.
I take refuge in pain.

Silvered is my love for you, a reflection of warmth by candlelight,
Yet in the dark revealed for truth, cold and dead in the lonesome night.

Life's Greatest Illusion Is Love.

*written in January 2004*