Men are like parking spaces, the good ones are taken and the rest are handicapped....

I was standing in the park wondering why frisbees got bigger as they got closer, then it hit me....

Men are like roses, they smell nice, but watch out for the pricks...

Guys are like public toilets, either their taken or full of shi*...

A man ia a king and a king is a ruler. A ruler is 12 inches long, still think ur a man???

You know its weird having people look at me with you thinking, why the hell is she with him, she could get so much better, but even if there is better, i don't want it, all i want is you...

Im a cocky witch, yeah i know, but thats all right, cause ur a whoe .....

Lifes a biotch, and then you die, so fluck the world lets all get high. i'm a stoner proud and true, i grow my weed and smoke it too, To all you preps who think your cool, go to hell, cause stoners rule....

If you try and don't suceed, cheat, repeat until caught, then lie.....

My knight in shining armor turned out to be a Jack@$$ wrapped in aluminum foil........