Maturity is knowing that just because someone disagrees with you doesn't mean he's a horse's ass. -Harry S Truman

I know God will not give me anything I can't handle. I just wish that He didn't trust me so much.
-Mother Teresa of Calcutta

No matter how great your triumphs or how tragic your defeats -- approximately 1.5 billion Chinese couldn't care less. -Lazlo's Chinese Relativity Axiom

People are morons. I don't have any other explanation. I really don't.
-Joss Whedon

It's not true that life is one damn thing after another; it is one damn thing over and over. -Edna St. Vincent Millay

Like its politicians and its wars, society has the teenagers it deserves. -J. B. Priestley

To paraphrase Oedipus, Hamlet, Lear, and all those guys, "I wish I had known this some time ago."-Roger Zelazny

Yes, risk-taking is inherently failure-prone. Otherwise, it would be called sure-thing-taking.-Tim McMahon

TED:My orders came through My squadron ships out tomorrow Were bombing the storage depots at Daiquiri at 1800 hours Were coming in from the north below their radar
ELAINE:When will you be back?
TED:I cant tell you that. Its classified.
David Zucker

Every time I try to define a perfectly stable person, I am appalled by the dullness of that person.-J.D. Griffin