I'm smiling because I received a gift. I opened it up and got four new shiny blades all for me. :)
Not just any blades various in size but all machetes. :)

My body freezes my beath is cold the room is dark. Death takes me by the hand and slowly drags me down to the ferryman and then to nothing.

When the heart shatters, the soul breaks, and the spirit fades. Lies on top of lies and crappy to finish it off. Coughing up blood and lungs now curled on the floor waiting for the last breath.

There's a smile on my face, tears in my eyes and blood from my mouth and multiple other wounds but the one bleeding the most is internal and death is near. I can hear it singing as it gets colder on this floor..

Still I'm nothing, never was and never will be anything. Guess I was never needed after all. So now I'll take my leave. No need on saying goodbye I guess because like me it to will be nothing and will mean nothing

So this is the true meaning of being a ghost?
I guess I already knew this feeling since it doesn't feel and different than living...

Again I wake to find that I've destroyed what I care for so now with a bottle of jack and 151 I'll destroy what no longer needs to be, that which never was.

I'll count the minute as I rip out these stitches and continue to drink just to see how much I can bleed before I'm done. I give it an hour.

This time is the last time, death is done playing tag and may finally win. So as my body grows cold and numb and my breath slowly leaves me, I will fade into the nothing which originally I was.

The only bad/good thing about death is saying"Goodbye" since you've said it so often then this isn't a bad thing ay all, Goodbye forever...