Every now and then i get tired of listening to the sound of my own tears.

Just because she comes off strong doesnt mean she didnt fall asleep crying. and even though she acts like everything is alright maybe, just maybe, shes really good at acting.

Be optimistic: everyone you hate will eventually die.

Honey, dont tell me im going crazy...i accomplished that before you could even say "nutcase."

Oh noes! dont forget your cape! youll plummet to the groouuund!....-sighs and dials 911

A woman once said that loving a man is like a deck of playing cards, you need: a heart to love him, a diamond to marry him, a club to bash his face in, and a spade do burry him.

Haha, im running with scissors! ow, my eye!

OMG! whats that thing growing on your neck? oh...its just your face.

My friends are the kind that if the house was burning down they would be making smores and hitting on the firemen.

Our friendship was like the titanic...said to be unsinkable.