Kenny: u dun trampled my trust and lolly gagged all over our friendship....... watever that means

Guy: my dad loves his bike more than me
guy2: thats not true
guy: he wrote it on my birthday card

Ya ur shirt is xxl but ur d ! c k will always be xxs

My mom: i thought you were hungry, are you gonna eat or facebook.
me: i also have to pee... i just dont know anymore

Who discovered we could get milk from cows, and what did he THINK he was doing at the time?!

I really wanna touch this bug zappeer...but somthing keeps telling me its a bad idea

When i need you
you werent there for me
so you can kiss my a** honestly

I live, not out of wisdom or knowledge, but out of hope and mere desire for love, for joy, for peace. And in the end I may look back on a life well lived.

I.M.in my friend:
i like who?? cough cough..hack hack
me: wtf
cough cough brb..i need some water
--sign off

What am I suppose to do when the best part of me was always you
What am I suppose to say when I'm all choked up and your ok
--Breakeven