After all thats happend no I don't believe anymore.

I don't understand why I'm so sad all the time, all I want is one day in the past back when things were going good for me.

Behind this smile and beneath these jokes there is something going on, you may not see it and you may not believe me but when I look at my life I'm not happy and I don't see the point in trying anymore if things wont get better.

Why do I feel like this is all my fault, I don't even understand whats going on and it seems like I'm doing something wrong and causing it.

I wish you were able to tell me whats on your mind.

God damn it I wish people would be more considerate of my feelings, I'm not the b.tch I pretend to be so I would appreciate a little respect and decency. I deserve that, at least that.

11 11 I wished that I could make him happy but I have realized that that was selfish because if I am no longer that one person in his life, then I want his new choice to make him happy. He deserves it.

Cher Pere Noel,
La seul chose que je veux pour Noel s'est qu'il m'aime comme avant, comme je lui aime tous les jours.
Affectueusement Jordan

Your the best and worst thing to ever happen to me, your the reason I laugh, cry, am happy and sad but I sepose with or without you around I'll love you until the end. (I can't help it)

If you honestly feel the way you tell me you do, then why is it so hard to end it with her?