My advice to you is get married: if you find a good wife you'll be happy; if not, you'll become a philosopher. - Socrates

Money doesn't make you happy. I now have $50 million but I was just as happy when I had $48 million.

There are worse things in life than death. Have you ever spent an evening with an insurance salesman?

Microsoft: "You've got questions. We've got dancing paperclips."

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I hate you because you make me love you.

"My knight in shining armor turned out to be a LOSER in aluminum foil."