A girl who knows kung-fu makes guys think twice.

If men break hearts, break their necks.

Sometimes love is like quicksand - the harder you try to get out, the harder it sucks you back in.

Him: Why are you wearing a bra ? Not like you have anything to put in there...
Her: You wear pants, don't you ?

Real eyes realize real lies.

Dog looks at a person:"You give me food, love, shelter..You must be God!"
Cat looks at a person:"You give me food, love, shelter..I must be God!"

When I die, I want to go peacefully like my Grandfather did, in his sleep - not screaming, like the passengers in his car.

If your wife wants to learn to drive, don't stand in her way.

"Marriage is give and take. You'd better give it to her or she'll take it anyway." - Joey Adams

Tears don't bleed because true love doesn't make you cry.