Twinkle, twinkle,
little s!*t.
Name one guy
you haven't f&&&ed.

Of all the things about me that could frighten you,
You worry about my driving.

I've come to the conclusion that I'm going to Hell in multiple religions.

I've said it so many times;
"I would change my ways, no never mind."
God knows I've tried..

This Isn't A Quote..
It's For My Friend Matt That Died In A Car Crash On 1.20.10. Matt, I Really, Really Miss You..I Honestly Didn't Want You To Go..But, I Hope You're Happy And Safe Up There..And Don't Forget To Save Me A Seat..

You Still Need Stars When You're Wishin' At Night, A Best Friend To Set You Right, A Good Laugh, A Warm Bath, And A Beautiful Song You Can Sing Along To.

I Couldn't Fix Your Breaks, So I Made Your Horn Louder.

I accidentally rear ended a car at a stoplight.
The driver, a midget, got out and yelled at me, "I'm Not Happy"
I leaned down and replied, "Well Then, Which One Are You?"

Be strong now
Because things will get better.
It may be stormy now,
But it can't rain forever.

In seven days, God created the world.
And in seven seconds, I shattered mine.