I'm an ice sculptor - last night I made a cube

I saw a dude, he was wearing a leather jacket, and at the same time he was eating a hamburger and drinking a glass of milk. I said to him "Dude, you're a cow. The metamorphasis is complete. Don't fall asleep or I'll tip you over."

That'd be funny if you were a drummer, and you grabbed two magical wands instead of drumsticks. You're pounding out the beat "1-2-3-4 Oh s***, my Bass Player's now a can of soup... Sorry Rick, I mean Cream of Mushroom!

I'm sick of Soup of the Day, it's time we made a decision. I wanna know what the Hell 'Soup From Now On' is.

I used to do drugs. I still do, but I used to, too.