The magician and the politician have much in common: they both have to draw our attention away from what they are really doing.

If toast always lands butter-side down, and cats always land on their feet, what happens if you strap toast on the back of a cat and drop it?

I hate it when people tell me so-and-so is so-and-so spelled backwards. I really don't care. It's not like I'm going to be writing something then say "Wait.. What if someone wants to read this looking in a mirror".

I hate it when people try to be like me. I should probably be flattered, but I'm angry, and a bit annoyed... Because, seriously, the last thing this world needs is more "me's"...

People come up to me and they say "Do people really come up to you?"

Sometimes people look at me... And they're worried... That I'll... Reproduce...

Do you want to know what really bugs me? What? No? You don't want to hear me complain? Okay..

I like it when people are like "don't label me!" I like chasing them around with label-makers. And they yell "Nooo!". What? That's what they're for.

I like listening to music in class. The only problem is, I have old school crappy headphones. They're ginormus. Today the teacher asked me "Am I stupid, or are you listening to your music.?"
"Ah, both.."

I had a dream last night... I was eating a huge marshmellow.. When I woke up, my pillow was gone.....