Sometimes I run outside in the middle of a thunderstorm, drop to my knees, throw my hands to the sky and let out the cry of a woman with no faith yelling at who and what i don't believe in. I know it wont help, I cant do anything else.

I am a girl who suffers
But I don’t want a show
I’ll always suffer in silence
And hope they never know
Because they are everything
My friends deserve it all
They deserve the happy end
They shouldn’t watch me fall

She doesn't look
But she still sees
They tell her god exists
But she doesn't believe
They tell her it will get better
And she laughs in their face
They make her say the prayer
But it's said with no faith

I swear I was never the same
When you walked away that day
And that kiss goodnight
Will stay with me

I am afraid of losing you
Dont promise youll never leave
its gonna hurt so bad
When you go back on that promising
Don't promise youll always care
We both know youre not there
Dont promise
cause when you leave
Maybe itll hurt less

If youre wondering how often I think of you
I think about you all the time.
If youre wondering how much I want you,
I wake up wanting you every day
If youre wondering if I want to think of you, if I want to want you, if I want to love you, I dont.

I need you to help me be strong, even though i could be strong on my own. I need a hug and a smile and a "baby you're not alone."

I need you to tell me I can do this, even though it hurts and every aspect is hard to see, I need a "I'm there for you my love." I need you to tell me you'll never leave.

What he said cut through my heart
And there's a lot i want to but shouldn't say
It hurts so much to be so far apart
He said "Babe, we're getting way too close to be so far away"

Why must dreams show us, what we dont want to feel?
Why must they make the impossible seem so real?
A dream is a wish your heart makes
But how much wishing can one heart take
When everything youre wishing for
Everything you want to be yours
Cant