How can something so beautiful be so painful. how can one tear tell a story. how can crying be so hard. how can eating be a chore in life, and not a choice.

Why do I love you
Don't even want to
Why do I love you like I do
Like I always do
You should've told me
Why did you have to be untrue (love you like I do)
Why do I love you like I do

I may be leaving today.
I may be disappearing in the mist of myself
I'm sick of being yelled out, sick of feeling like a screw up...
but hey, maybe that is me after all,
stupid and a screw up...
sorry mom and dad i let you down.

I'm left with nothing but fear...
what do i do now?
i don't want to be scared
but i dont want to HAVE to be strong
can i just be me, for once?

I always have you with me... just not in the way most people think...
Your name is engraved in my arm.

Most would never see the wiped tears
most would never see how i could cry all day
but the only reason is because i like to hide my pain.

You're the one who wiped the tears from my eyes as they gently fell
you're the one who stayed with me during the night as i slowly cut
but also, you're the one who made me stop, with simple words...

:I love you:

:to tell you the truth, i haven't been avoiding you.. just my life.

YOU can't say you know ME, when I don't even know MYSELF.

I'm sorry i'm not her, i'm sorry i'm not perfect. if you want her so badly, try to get her, and don't try to get me.