In human relationships, distance is not measured in miles but in affection. Two people can be right next to each other, yet miles apart.

My day could have been better if I had spent it with you.

I wish that you were here, or I were there, or we were together anywhere.

There are so many scams on the Internet now...Send me $19.95 and I will tell you how to avoid them.

You're more confused than a chameleon in a bag of skittles.

I'd jump in front of a bus for you...As long as its not moving.

You were never really mine, it's plain to see, but when you're in love you believe almost anything. I never knew just how far I'd let myself go until I feel for a heart that was too hard to hold.

If your legs open up faster than Google's homepage, you are not girlfriend material.

When a telemarketer calls, give the phone to the nearest child and tell them it's Santa on the phone!

Whenever you're feeling down, remember; you're the sperm that won.