I don't make mistakes...I date them.

Me: How are you feeling today?
Her: Fine.
Me: I asked how you were feeling, not how you looked.

I love how, in scary movies, the person yells out, Hello? As if the bad guy is gonna be like, Yeah, I'm in the kitchen! Want a sandwich?

Today I saw a baby with a bib that said 'This dumba** put my cape on backwards.'

The problem is, obesity runs in our family. No, the problem is no-one runs in your family...

Distance means so little when someone means so much.

It's better to love someone who's far and craves to be with you than to love someone who's near yet doesn't even care to see you.

Even though we're miles apart, a computer screen connects our hearts.

I'll hold you in my heart, till I can hold you in my arms.

Love doesn't die because of distance. It dies because of doubt.