Go to the ant, thou sluggard,
Keep working til you're buggered...

Tree stands solid
on road side...

Incubator, mother's breast.
dressing up box, old string vest...

We know everything about you,
where you work, where you live...

Well they waved their flags when Thatcher died
and they laid her in the ground...

As Beyonce jerks and Miley twerks
and tits still pop out of the sun...

In light years from now, the Planet Zog will be...
and Zoggians will live in fright of a knock on the...

Away the lads, the lads away,
we're going away on holiday...

With thanks and apologies to the late, great Mr...
Big brother's on the telly...

Hooded shadows lurking
in the darkened corners...

'You're not going out wearing that!'
said my son in disgust at my grey trilby hat...

I've never had a period, it's true.
I've never suffered labour pains like you...